NAME STEALING, CHEF BITCH!!

So today I was just wandering around my kitchen looking for something to eat when I saw a cooking magazine lying on the counter. Since I had nothing better to do and the cover looked pretty snazzy I decided to read it. I was about to give up and go watch extremely boring t.v. when something caught my eye....MY NAME!!!...Yup it turns out there is this red headed, middle aged chef that is named Elisabeth (spelled a little different than mine..S instead of z) Solverson. How weird is that?...Well I was quite creeped out. No one else should have my name. I mean what if one day later she becomes famous but just like famous in the cooking world and then she dies and it is on the cover of a cooking magazine and some people I know walk by it in a grocery store and think I am dead?!....That would suck and a bunch of people would call my family and be like "I am so sorry" and they would be like "what?...Liz died?" and it would cause alot of confusion...I hate being confused cause it happens too much. ya that would not be very cool...Unless some one hated me and they were all happy that I died ...Then I could go and pretend to be a ghost...A very solid ghost..And haunt them hehe.No, it is official I am changing my name...No I am gonna go find this bitch and make her change her name! ya that is what I will do and I hope she is never heard of again....I doubt she will be cause the recipe sucked! Well I didn't cook it but it sounded grose! cheerio. Liz, out. I hate when Ryan seacrest does that it sounds dumb but I'm going to anyways cause "Liz, out" sounds better than "Seacrest, out".